Sticks and stones and an angry commenter

When a person starts a blog, it is usually to share their opinions, writing or stories with the wider world. You want to connect.

And when you do that, you take a risk.

My blog has always been very open, almost too open some could say. I started writing this when I was going through the slightly strange time of preparing for a hysterectomy at the age of 34. I wanted to share my experience as much as possible to provide the information I so had wanted myself. I have always tried to make it very clear that this has been my personal experience and that we are all different.

There have been some lovely comments from complete strangers to the posts about the hysterectomy and people reaching out have warmed my heart. And it has taken until today that I became the target, of what I can only assume, of someone’s fear and frustration.

I received the following comment (as yet I haven’t approved it to show on the blog) to a post I had written about my immediate post hysterectomy recovery;

You are an idiot to have risked so much by showing off. Its not a competition to see who can get physical first, after an operation. You have probably done yourself long term damage you will have to deal with 10 years down the line. More importantly, you have put pressure on all of those women who are in REAL pain following a hysterectomy, to do more than they should be doing. You are highly irresponsible. I doubt you’ve had a hysterectomy at all. Stupid woman.

This left me speechless. I must really have pissed someone off for them to take the time to pen such a hurtful comment. I re-read the post I had written all those months ago and frankly my immediate thought was that it was badly written. I was clearly still under some sort of  Tramadol cloud… But even with the very clunkiness of it, I can’t understand what could someone find so provocative about it.

I appreciate we are all different and that not everyone has, or will have, such an easy time with their recover as I did. Have I inadvertently touched a sore spot with this woman? Is she having a hard time recovering from her operation? Is she about to have her operation and feeling scared? Either way, I respect the fact that we are all individuals and so should she. No, it is not a competition and I never made it out to be. Does she feel I am challenging her? I seriously doubt I have caused myself long term damage by taking a walk after what was, in my case,  essentially only a small, laparoscopic operation. But I appreciate the concern for my wellbeing. And whilst I can’t say I suffered that much pain post-op, whatever there was, was REAL, darling.

There is a lot of scaremongering out there about the hysterectomy. Most of the stories you read put you off ever having the operation. Is it really so unusual to hear a positive story for a change?

But then none of this should really matter anyway. Why worry about the long term damage as I am clearly demented enough to be writing a blog about a hysterectomy that I never really had, right? Oh hey, maybe I am not even a woman!…